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7 phrases you should never say to an angry child

7 phrases you should never say to an angry child


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How to deal with a whirlwind? Would you face him or wait for him to pass you by? The same goes for tantrums and anger in children. Actually, an angry child is like a whirlwind, unable to control his emotions. If you expose yourself to it, you are lost; if you try to stop it ... surely, too.

There are words capable of generating many emotions, of softening them ... or making the situation worse. If you try to stop a childish whirlwind-anger with some inappropriate word, the whirlwind will turn into a hurricane. We tell you what phrases you should never say to an angry child. For your own good ... and his.

Words hurts. They also heal. So learning to use them properly is an art and of course, a necessity.

In fact, there are words as destructive (or more) as a punch. So the best thing is that we learn to control them. Here is a list that you should never say to an angry child, if you really want to help him manage his anger:

1. Do not be angry that you have no reason! Well, 'his' motive may be a trifle to us, but it's important to him. Their world is different and so is their scale of values. Instead of making him think that his things are useless, you can help him channel his anger.

2. Stop throwing things! The first impulse, before that little whirlwind that begins to throw everything away with fury is to prohibit it from doing so. But the child at that moment will understand the prohibition as yet another threat, and his anger will most likely grow.

3. Don't even think about hitting anyone! If in the midst of anger the child begins to hit, it is normal that you try to stop him. Everything has a limit and their anger has far exceeded them. However, that phrase sounds threatening and violent. And you know that violence with violence are not good companions. You can try to explain this to him without yelling, seriously but without threats. Explain that it doesn't stick, that we all get angry but it never sticks.

4. Stop the tantrum now and do what I tell you now! Very well, it will be clear to the child that you have zero empathy, that you do not understand why he is angry and that you also do not intend to help him. At this point, the tantrum may increase and the screaming may become even louder. Remember to always start the sentences with 'I know you are angry, I understand you ..' and then explain why they should stop their anger.

5. Not older. cry, stop crying! You will agree that this is a big lie. Why lie about emotions? The child will think that the emotions should not be externalized, that they should 'drown' them and therefore, sacrifice and feel intense anguish and pain inside before externalizing anything.

6. Stop complaining! Again we are indicating to the child who does wrong, that he should not express his anger. Instead, we should teach him another way to complain.

7. You are impossible! O well You are a monster! What your child needs in a moment of uncontrollable anger is understanding, not destructive criticism of this kind. In the end, you will end up believing that it is true, that it does not and has a solution, and this will only make the situation worse.

In reality, when we are angry, what really helps us to free ourselves is to expel everything that we carry inside, right? For this reason, the best thing is not to put obstacles to that anger that we carry inside.

In the case of children, the same thing happens. Why don't you try these tips to help your child in the event of a tantrum or anger? Try them out before spouting destructive phrases like 'you're embarrassing me' or 'you're a demon':

1. Use a war cry. Yes, yelling helps us release anger. Perhaps because it is like a liberating gesture. We have something that makes us feel very bad and we expel it. You can look up a battle cry and teach your child to use it whenever he is feeling very angry. War cries like 'You can't with me!' May be of great help to you.

2. Make him see everything from another perspective. When your child starts throwing everything out in a fit of anger, maybe instead of yelling at him, what really helps him is that you make him think ... why is he doing that? If you say: you don't like those things anymore? Do you throw them away because you don't want them anymore? He will be so surprised, that maybe he will stop, reconsider and let time pass and with it, anger.

3. Don't let him cross certain limits. For example, if you hit another child in the middle of a fit of anger, it is something that you cannot allow. Establish that limit very well because if not your child's anger will absorb him completely. Remember not to push him away by yelling at him or worse, hitting him, but telling him with a firm voice that he can be angry but not hit, never hit.

4. Show empathy. The child, when he feels understood and supported, feels more secure, calmer. Many children just need a gesture of understanding from their parents to open up to 'negotiate' and to understand why they should not behave like this.

5. Let him express his emotions. Trying to slow down an emotion is like trying to slow down a giant wave. In the end, you will die by drowning. When we ask a child not to express his emotions, it is as if we asked him to try to stop a giant wave. Wouldn't it be better to let it come out but in such a way that it doesn't hurt anyone? This is achieved by helping our son to channel his emotions well.

6. Teach him ways to channel his anger. Drawing, breathing, music ... there are many ways to help us express our emotions without harming anyone. How about you help your child find the method that works best for him?

You can read more articles similar to 7 phrases you should never say to an angry child, in the category of Conduct on site.


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