When the child seems to ignore us if we ask them something

When the child seems to ignore us if we ask them something

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Many parents feel that when they speak or ask their children for something they are ignored. How many times, for example, do we ask children to pick up their things from the room and they don't.

The fact that they ignore it does not become a serious problem but it does wear and tear. Parents spend a lot of time calling for attention, so that their children obey but it seems that they do not listen and continue with their own thing. What can we do when the child seems to ignore us if we ask them for something?

When children ignore their parents, it produces a burnout that makes adults think that they are losing their authority and are not able to handle their children. This desperation leads to looking for the solution in the screams and punishments.

As the children grow up It seems that children do not hear what they do not want to hear. It is the way that children have to show their independence and autonomy. Their priorities begin to be different from their parents. When children ignore their parents, they are somehow rewarded as:

- The child manages to continue doing the activity for longer that they were up to and get rid of doing something that they ask and don't feel like doing. In this way, you see that ignoring is effective in getting rid of what they are asking you.

- Parents admit that the child will ignore them so when they ask their children to do something they do it without conviction. This attitude reinforces the child's ignoring behavior.

- Children get special attention. They see that this behavior makes parents stop what they are doing and this serves as reinforcement.

- Another reason children seem to ignore their parents is that they have some hearing problem. It will be recommended that if this reason is suspected, the parents contact the doctor and evaluate their development.

There is no magic recipe that helps us to educate our children, even so we can follow some guidelines to get over this stage in which children seem to ignore us. For it:

- Patience and perseverance. This is the key. We cannot pretend that the child will spontaneously pay attention because the adults order it. Adults must be constant and be patient because the child will understand that he must fulfill and carry out his tasks if we insist. But this insistence must be kept away from yelling and punishment. Parents must understand that their role is to accompany and not impose.

- Be clear on requests. Parents' requests to their children must be short, specific and easy to understand. It cannot be done in the form of a question or suggestion since it will lead to the child not complying with them. Also, not many instructions should be given at once. They will have to be given one by one and given enough time to fulfill them.

- Motivate the child. The idea is that you pay attention because you want and not because you are forced to. Encouraging and praising your child when they do the things we ask them to do can work. Another way is to encourage the child with the points tables in which they can get something they want if they listen. It is not convenient to abuse these techniques so as not to accustom the child to expecting a reward whenever he does what we ask him to do.

- Understanding. It happens to children the same as to adults: it is difficult for us to change activities or do some pending task when we are immersed in another activity that we like. Whenever possible, parents should give their child some advance notice so that he can prepare for a change rather than rush him into doing what we want.

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